I spent the summer on campus, working in the TAC admissions office. It was great to be on campus in the peace and quiet, and to have time to do things I don't normally have time for during the school year. It almost felt like a three-month-long retreat. I was also able to get together with friends before leaving campus for good. It doesn't feel real yet that I'll never be back there, but I'm guessing it'll sink in once I start cloistered life.
TAC was a blessing in my life in so many ways. On the academic side, of course, college was amazing. I spent two years reading and thinking in company with others who were reading and thinking, and for a temperament like mine, that's a little slice of Heaven. But beyond the academics, there was so much more that I learned from college, about God, myself, others, the Church...the list goes on. And I met people who have had a profound and lasting influence on me as a person.
And, of course, if I hadn't gone to TAC I would never have even thought of visiting the Norbertine sisters! I can't credit TAC with my knowing about them at all, but I can credit it with making me actually notice them. One of our on-campus chaplains is a Norbertine, and we've had others visit now and then, which makes a strong presence for a little-known order. (Have I ever mentioned the beautiful variety of chaplains we have? -- A diocesan priest, a Jesuit, a Dominican, and a Norbertine, all living with us and being our spiritual fathers.) In addition to that, campus is within easy driving distance of the sisters' monastery in Tehachapi, which is really what made visiting them feasible before the beginning of sophomore year. And again at Easter, and a couple of times this summer.
It's funny, because as indecisive as I am, I never once wavered in my decision to go to TAC (which, by the way, I made when I was nine years old). I'd often wondered why I was so certain about that one aspect of my life, and discovering my vocation to the Norbertine order gave me the answer. God put me in the perfect position to be open and available to receive His call. I would never have come to California otherwise, and now I'll be spending the rest of my life there. So nothing was an accident, or a weird fluke. The Holy Spirit drew my heart west before I realized what was happening.
Saying goodbye to my family this summer was really hard, and saying goodbye to school was hard too. Especially right now that the school year has already begun, and my friends are telling me about their new classes and tutors, there is a bit of a feeling of being left out. I think that'll go away once I get settled at the monastery, though. I'm "left out" now, but soon I will be included in something greater. This in-between period is weird, but I guess that happens with any transition.
Anyway, it was a wonderful and prayerful summer, and I really am ready for my entrance, with apprehensions about it only coming up occasionally. I know God's got me, and so does my confirmation saint, St. Therese, who was also a cloistered nun! If she can do it, so can I, with her prayers. And a lot of other people's prayers.
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